We have all had a long day, that is putting it lightly.  Then, it's Friday the 13th for all of us who suffer the dreaded triskdecaphobia it was even longer. And for those of us whose bosses were out of town at the beach and calling with a laundry list of "things that had to be done today," it got worse. And to top it all off I am a native Iowan, my family is still there are I worry about my family and friends and my native soil washing away while I sit helpless thousands of miles away. I guess you could say, I have it all!  Personally I need a break. I really need a fun diary - I missed Cheers and Jeers when all the cool kids were there and really wanted to splash around in the kiddie pool.  And the way my day is going, I'm sure such a diary was posted while I struggled with this.  Nevertheless...

She lay on the grass, a vibrant, vivid green only seen in a northwestern American spring. The green that glows in the late day sun. Her skin is ivory, glowing translucently, lit from within.  Her face flawless and at peace.  Her golden hair flows free like strands of silk in the wind. A light rises behind her, revealing the perfection in her exsistence.  

I awake. The light of a new day attempts to creep into my room through the slates of the shades on my window invading my day, trying to steal this scene of peace and serenity. But her vision is not one that will leave. It stays with me, and comforts me.

She is not a lover, nor a mate, nor a sister.  She is, she was, a friend.  She is young and but now she has left her earthly home.  

My car smiles at me
as I walk out the door to death

I love my car,
I know it is wrong to love something so material

But, my car is fast, it is sleek
It is fun to share the road with,
It gives me a taste of lost youth

That was the slogan on a button I got on the day I recieved my POW/MIA bracelet - way back in the day. The day when people who believed the war was wrong were told we didn't care about our troops. Unlike some people I did not have to worry about what my next deferment would be (I was a young female) nor was I concerned about drug testing whilst a memeber of the champaign unit of the Texas Air National Guard. My body was drug free then.  

James K. Patterson was the son of my aunt's neighbor and her son was missing.  She lived in California which gave an air of mystic to my bracelet in Iowa's farm country.  

This is going to be a quick diary entry just to let everyone know, especially those in the downtown Portland area (who can get over there quickly!) that John Edward will be appearing at the moveon.org rally in just about 25 minutes. I would have gone with an open thread post, but there isn't one right now, so...

This doesn't give me lots of time to research and link up but, if you have a chance, it would be great to get over to the South Park Blocks

Thursday, December 28th is a day that I will never forget.  It was the day I drove my 16 year old daughter to in patient rehab for her heroin addition.  It is a day I never envisioned and never believed could ever occur.  Call me an ostrich, with my head in the sand - there were so many things I did not want to see.  

One of the differences between my daughter and me is that she is  lyric person and I am a music person.  I hear notes, she hears words.  Many of my favorite songs are the instrumentals, she takes the obscure songs with lyrics that describe her life as she perceives it.  

When I was in my 20th year I found out I was pregnant, again. At sixteen, I became pregnant through youthful inexperience. And had an abortion.  At 19, I became pregnant, according to the docs, because my birth control was too low of a dose, who knows, but I suffered a miscarriage.  

I have always and will always support a woman's right to make the choice that is right for her when an unexpected pregancy occurrs.  

In my 20th year, I made the choice to have the child and place it for adoption.

For the last year and a half, dKos has been a major force in my life. I log on about 5:30 am, read all through the day at work,occasionally post-and-run (back to work) check it when I get home at night, and do a quick scan before bed at about 11:00 pm.   My husband lives with my rants, my kids expect the rude, crude joke about the administration.  Yes, I am addicted.

Please join me below the fold...

I have never diaried before, so please excuse my errors to come.   Last night I finished re-reading The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood, a science fiction novel written in 1985.

The first time I read the book it had just been released and I saw it as a fascinating look at events that could never happen in my America.  

This second reading scared the shit out of me.

More Below...........